...the death of veganism

It's November. Soon 2009 will come to a close, and I will have to face myself, ask myself what did I accomplish this year.

I am afraid that the answer will be 'not enough'. I am going to try to focus on getting more writing done for the next two months.

1. It's National Novel Writing Month

Each November, since 2006, I have set out to write a novel. There is a part of me that wonders what would make this year any different. I try to hush my own self-skepticism in search of a more disciplined, creative self.

I cheated a little, I'm starting with 15 pages I have written earlier this year. But, NaNoWriMo or not, I am going to try to get more writing done.

2. Not Quite Vegan

Whenever people ask me how I became vegetarian, I always tell them a story of living in a vegan household one summer. I never tell them the five or six years of refraining from beef, pork and fish prior to going full-veggie.

If I am going to be vegan, it's going to take a little more work, a little more effort and a little more time.

First time I tried in August, I lasted two days. Second time I tried in October, I lasted two weeks.

I'm not quite vegan... this venture may take a while.

3. Writing

Everyone says that I work on too many writing projects at once. Because I am split in so many directions.... I end up not completing anything.

They're right. One novel, one screenplay; that's it. I'll focus on other things after I finish one novel, one screenplay.

4. A New Life

At times, I feel a bit trapped and a bit paranoid. Maybe I am trapped and I have good reason to be paranoid. Regardless, focusing on my trap or my paranoia will not help me turn my life around.

So, I have to focus on the things that I can change. There are a few things which are still within my control.

...I guess the primary goal is to not give up.

5. My Fatal Flaws

I'm really too self-conscious of a person to interact with people on a regular basis. There was a brief moment immediately after college when I thought I might become a socialite. Now, I worry I will never live my own confusion down.

I hope that I can find a job that pays my bills and a studio large enough to hold my books. Nothing great or extravagant. Just a private room to write in and a way to pay for it.... that's all.