What is acceptable, What is not...

1. On Conformity

Eventually, I will learn my lesson. Eventually I will conform. I will cut of my locks, and perm my hair. And, I will paint a smile on my face even when there is nothing to smile about. Because in the end, I know that is what I appear less threatening. And others are more comfortable around me.

I was really close to conformity when I lived in New York. I cut all of my hair off and I wanted to perm it. But after about five years of being natural, I just couldn't do it to myself. So instead of perming my hair, I put "invisible braids" in my hair. The braids, only resting at the top, gave the appearance of longer, straighter hair.

In sales, even telephone sales, you learn that appearance is everything. Some folks won't do business with you based off of your dress, or the look in your eye.

Those months of near conformity were the happiest months of my life. My coworkers liked me, or at least accepted me. I was advancing in my career. And, I had a network of people to at least be seen with, if nothing else.

Eventually, I will learn to conform.

[Alright, alright... I'll leave weaves alone today. A weave never hurt anybody...] But, hell, maybe I'll cut my locks and wear a weave or a wig or something more palateable.

2. On Smiling

A lot of people tell me I should smile more. Let me make it known, I have nothing against smiling. I think it's a beautiful phenomenon.

I just find a woman's disposition to be a peculiar thing. In an office setting, there are a few men who walk around smiling ear to ear. The men who are naturally bubbly and happy. But most of the men, are just themselves; neither smiling or frowning. Just being.

Sometimes, I would like to just be. But, I'll learn to conform. I'm 25 now. I'll learn before 26.